Reviews...May 2012

16 - Deep Cuts from Dark Clouds (Relapse)
Cavernous, perfect, clean, generic ass plastic production. Do these bands all go to the same place and just put a different name? It sounds like a fukking computer. All the balls have been digitally stitched on. Comparisons to Prong, Unsane, and Helmet kinda make sense I suppose. But only in the sense that it lies in a real middle road territory which is hard to explain, but is generally very basic and unsatanic in feel - yet very Metal riff oriented. I dunno what these guys are thinking. I mean, it's heavy without actually feeling heavy. It's loud but feels soft. The screams have no anger or conviction. It's about as intense as Trent Reznor getting electrocuted while shaving with his electric razor in the shower.

Ancient Wisdom - A god like Inferno (Prosthetic)
Ahh! Forgot I ain't reviewing Prosthetic stuff anymore. Why? Well this shit is a perfect example! If you need a sex change, don't spend any money, just listen to this for 5 minutes.

Fear Factory - The Industrialist (Candlelight)
Uh oh, not this band. Do I have to? Ah shit, who am I kidding - I can't wait to see how shitty this is! Let's see - well thanks guys, for including the actual musical genre you are playing within your album title! Now I don't have to guess what to call this wanna be Ministry/Biohazard/Machine Head stuff. I have to admit, the first song sounds kinda cool for a minute - it's kinda like a sound splicing jerk off session. Very well produced. But even after hearing the most triggered out clickity clack double bass on technical Death Metal albums, this still manages to out click the clickiest of em. My little computer speakers are actually managing to squeeze out a bass drum CLICK that hurts my ear. Still, I almost liked this till the horrible Creed vocals came in (or emo or whatever dumb vocals you wanna call it) This is not total shit - just mostly shit. And what is good is a 2nd or 3rd rate immitation of something else.

Ihsahn - Eremita (Candlelight)
Oh boy, here we go! So Emperor guy is back with his Depeche Mode influenced Black Metal. Starts out all Depeche Mode Black Metal, then gets all emo melodic for the chorus. Actually, sounds kinda like the melodic vocals in Opeth. I can't tell the difference between these awful singers who think that they are good because they are actually singing notes insead of growling. I mean, I applaud the effort - but it just sounds so watered down to my ears. It's like pop music that really thinks it is deep and artistic. Maybe it is, but sounds like crap to me! Parts are cool, but why they wanna combine the sounds they do is beyond me. Alice in Chains one Minute, Maralyn Manson the Next, and finally, a mandatory nod to Depeche Mode every couple minutes so those people with lots of eyeliner and hair products don't get alienated.

Six Feet Under - Undead (Metal Blade)
The original singer of Cannibal Corpse is back, and he's armed with what looks like completely different band members than were originally in the band. Anyways, initially this sounds much more typical Death Metal to me than the mid tempo stuff I know them for. But then, I never paid tons of attention to this band because they are always just not that exciting to me. Maybe it's just me, but it kinda sounds like they are trying to sound like Cannibal Corpse. And not just old Cannibal Corpse. Lots of blast beats and "nununununananananunununnininin" scary "your in deep shit" riffs. So far, I have to say this may be the best I have heard from this band! It doesn't sound exactly like Cannibal Corpse, but it's got all the same ingredients I like about the old stuff. Old formula, new band. Vocals are kinda strange. I mean what the hell can Chris really do with his voice but try to sound the same? He doesn't sound the same anymore but he sounds good. If you like old school Death Metal, I would say this is worth checking out. Oh, "Blood on my Hands" is not a Morbid Angel cover. It's a good sludger of a doom death tune.

Sleep - Dopesmoker (Southern Lord)
This album came out in 1999 or something. I don't know why everyone is acting like it just came out. Yeah, it was shelved for a while and put back and taken off and blah blah everyone knows the story (or some form of it). Anyways, it's been re-issued at least twice but I guess this is the one the labels really wanna cash in on. As far as the music - well I have listened to this for many years, because as I said, it came out like 13 years ago or something. I guess I see this album more as "High on Fire's" first album. Because it's basically a long ass droned out version of the first High on Fire, which I actually liked because it was pretty heavy and different in its' own way. The thing about Dopesmoker is that it always sounds awesome for like 3, 5, 10 minutes. But it always wears off. The Melvins knew how to really hammer it home way too long, but then pull back and throw something random in just to fuck with you. This is kinda like the heaviest Melvins without all the brains and twice as much weed. It's a drone, flat out. It gets old for me, but if you like the drone sludge out fest, it really doesn't get any better and I'd say this has to be one of the first bands to really popularize it. But I ain't an expert Mr Noise Drone Elitist. Anyone seen my Master of Reality CD anywhere???

Strong Intention - Razorblade Express (Patac)
This is that grinding Eyehategod meets Brutal Truth sorta stuff. I hate to use the word generic here because these guys seem like cool fellows that I would probably get along with, but I dunno what else to call completely unoriginal stuff like this. It's done well. Very harsh yet heavy. I like the production. Live this would be fun, especially on the right kinds of substances and with the right beverages ingested. It just bums me out that this kinda music is so trendy now and to me it was never meant to be blasted in some huge venue, it was meant to live and die in sweaty dirty punk rock warehouses. Not saying these guys are on that trendy bandwagon, but I'm sure they wouldn't jump off if that bus rolled up. I'm sure it is not their intention to break new ground here. And it's not my intension to force myself to like it. It's good, just real unoriginal and not really what I dig at the moment. But if that's what yer into go for it bro.

Reviews 4/16/12

Allegaeon "Formshifter" (Metal Blade)
This album starts out with "Behold (I am god), which really aughta be called "Behold (We are generic)." I don't know where to start. From the stupid
drums flipping out like an electric typwriter on random mode to the elegant sweep pick solos which blurs in and out of the mayhem like some colorful
butterfly appearing in the front row of a gwar concert..."The Azazel Trigger" is a promising song title. Unfortunately, this "promise" is over produced
Mushugga knock off riffs and pointlessly discordant passages which seem to be in the same key as every other song. I guess all the classical training these
guys got didn't rub off by way of writing a memorable part. The photoshop font logo pretty much sums this up. A cheap overly produced and gleamingly polished
turd.

Burzum "Umskiptar" (Candlelight)
The title is an old Nordic saying, which means to sort of "Skip" whilst thinking aloud and playing guitar. Ok anyways - back when Varg was imprisoned for
stabbing Euronymous in the back like 30 times and instantly became an "amazing musician" because of this, as well as his wonderful racist rantings of course,
and let's not forget the church burnings - which always improve guitar and vocal skills! Anyhow, when he walked into the sub zero prison cell he was famously
served some Nordic Moose soup (as documented by Peer Beeste and "Lords of Chaos"), which was so cold that it froze within his beard instantly. It remained frozen within his beard for the duration of his stay within the cold walls of the Swedish maximum security facility. Since he has
left prison, his beard has begun to thaw, and so he's been "milking" his beard for every last drop when it is time to enter the studio. Sure, it is the old
recipe - but after too much you need some nice Thai soup or something to change the pace for a bit. His wife Helga has told him this on numerous occassions,
which pisses him off to no end. Therefore, he wrote "Hit Helga Tre" in mockery of her. Back to the soup...once you thaw something out it immediately begins
to spoil. Like george Thoroughgood, Varge drinks alone. The only one that will hang out with him is his dear old grandad, who brings
tales of ancient nordic lore to the ever curious, maturing jailbird. Now pardon me, I must UMSKIPTAR out of here - my cherry tomatos are ripe and a salad
would be nice right about now.

Cattle Decapitation "Monolith of Inhumanity" (Metal Blade)
Stupidly fast grind. ANyhing memorable flies by so fast it doesn't stick. Drums sound like he's hitting Campbell's soup cans. Bass drum sounds like
Maralyn Manson slapping his thighs really fast with hard salami. Vocals try to be extreme in just about every way possible. Yet still sounds like a 12 year old
kid who just discovered grind and thinks it just came out. Some stupid circus chorus chants floating around here and there, lots of "flibity flabity sweep
guitar solos" I haven't heard a ton of this band over the years, but I can't remember the last time a band tried so much harder and sounded so much shittier.
I suppose that is a feat. Ok, it has a few moments...but I am not into this shit these days obviously...or it's just gotten too cliche to appreciate anymore.
The mindless grind slam bros will eat this shit up though.

Havok "Point of No return" (Candlelight)
New EP probably rushed out into the market so that they'd have something new to give out on the tour with Death Angel and Krisiun and Sepultura. Nice guitar
tone, good producion. Stupid vocals, stupid songs. Tracks 3 and 4 consist of 1 stupid Sepulura cover and 2 stupid Slayer covers both from Reign in Blood.
These dudes are so ignorant about the history of good underground Thrash and it shows very clearly in their display of lowest common denominator cliches which miss the heart and soul every time. Hate to be so brutal but it is
warranted here. In fact, this review is more brutal than this band. If this is the "new school" then bands like Slayer and Exodus have ZERO to worry about,
as their thrones are not getting passed on anytime soon. AT least not to bands like this.

Katana "Storms of War" (Listenable)
This band's bio name drops like 50 people and 50 bands for 2 paragraphs before even describing the music of this album. So I'm not gonna bother mentioning
that Andy La Rocque produced it and that they toured with "American Metal Legends" Lizzy Borden and Where Angels Suffer (featuring Chris Holmes and Stret
Howland (ex WASP))...Oops. Anyways, as much as all that info has already sold me on this band, let's talk about the music (even though we really don't need to) this singer is your typical Euro soft voiced traditional Metal falsetto. Kinda sounds like the Stryper dude. Songs are
traditional Euro Metal with more of a Stryper leaning, than say, Metal Church. In fact, I think Stryper is their main influence. Just kidding. This is fun
Euro traditional Metal. That's about it. Catch them at every side stage at every Euro Metal fest this summer.

Lakei "Konspirasjoner" (Indie Recordings)
Nordic Hipster Crusty Punk packaged nice and clean and marketed as "underground." Yeah the guitar sound is dirty and Swedish, the themes are appropriately
apocalyptic, guitar solos are not allowed, vague references to just about anything "dark" yet saying fuck all about anything in reality, yada yada...this shit was done to death in the 90s - do we need another 2nd rate cleaned up version? Appearantly so.

Moonloop "Deeply from Earth" (Listenable)
Like the band name implies, these guys think they are quirky and original. Like the album title implies, they think they are doing something super deep and
important. Well Shaxul says that mixing Joe Satriani and Death Metal is a bad idea. But then, he did produce a Possessed album. Still, his Alien Love Music
just doesn't belong in a Spanish Death Metal band. Or does it? Perhaps it is their quest to prove or disprove this. These guys need to come out of the closet instead of hanging on to Death Metal in order to prove their
heterosexuality. With any luck, they will score a tour with opeth or Tool (their heroes).

My Dynamite "s/t" (Listenable)
This bands trying to be all 70s Rock n Roll. The album cover is totally trying to look retro. Even the guitars are super lightly fuzzed and intentionally
loose. It's not bad, but that pretty much sums it up. Like a good 70s Rock cover band. Like the singer says, "Take it or leave it."

Never to Arise "Hacked to Perfection" (Bad god Music)
The slaughered naked bald chick depicted on the front of this is presumably the one who has been "hacked to perfection." Question is, why did they hack off
her hair while leaving her scalp intact? Anyways, I'm sure the drummer is responsible - as his arms and legs seem to move sporratically in all directions
at once. So they just put him behind a drum kit and the search was over! You might say he is a born drummer. The downside is he cannot take medication or
his drum abilities vanish...anyways, this is extremely brutal and fast. What the fukk else do you want me to say? I mean - fucking Nile sings about Egypt,
Krisiun sings about whatever the fukk they sing about - fukking brazilian fukking beaches - and Never to Arise sings about "Mysogynistic Acts of Barbaric Sadism."
These bands are so literal in their titles that reviews are not even needed. The descriptions are all but spelled out. Some nice "your in deep shit" riffs here and there. Very Cannibal Corpsey when
they slow down. Ok what the fuck is this? Either this is a drum machine or the drummer has some serious triggers. He plays this beat which is a "double blast."
But the drums don't even matter here. It's all about the riffs - which are pretty cool and kinda fucked at parts. For "BRUALITY IS THE LAW" music, this
ain't bad. Just get a more original drummer and the next album might be a classic! Yeah I don't care if he is fast and chops meat faster than Martin Yan. Martin Yan makes killer food, this guy doesn't.

Trioscapes "Seperate Realities"
Whoah...now that's a cool way to start a fucking album! This is hard prog Jazz rock, it isn't Metal but there is some obvious Metal influence. This is like
really killer ELP or Mahavisnu with a contemporary Metal influence. Shit, this was a complete surprise. Thank god there is some non shit on my review list!
If you wanna hear some REAL prog throw away your Dream Theatre and pick this up. Killer killer production. Why can't Metal bands sound this good? I don't
think there's vocals on this. Way to go Metal Blade. Although I must say, this so does NOT fit on the label. I guess they really are moving away from Metal.
Weird, but at least it's quality.

Unisonic "s/t" (Armoury)
Super polished, overly produced, commercial sounding Rock with hints of only the most mainstream of 80s Euro Metal cliches. Basically, this is pop rock in
the guise of "Metal." Comparable, I suppose, with bad Saxon material - which is still better than this. They should change their name to Bad Saxon. That would rule.

My Last Rampage Radio Show...

No, it's not an April Fools joke! Below is a playlist and link to my final Rampage Radio show. Funny enough, this would have been exactly 4 years from the date I opened the Record store back in 2008. How appropriate! Anyways, I think this was one of the best shows I've done and I encourage you to check it out. Besides the usual crazy mixture of music, there is an exclusive interview I did with Pat Obrian (Cannibal Corpse) last week.

If you are not familiar with Rampage Radio - it began in 1982 on KUSF college radio, 90.1 FM. It is the longest running Metal Radio show I know of in the USA. It was where many bands were introduced to the bay area, and in some cases, the US. Yngwie, Metallica, Mercyful Fate just to name a few. And you can look this up - it is documented out there.

I was asked by Tonus "the DJ from Hell" Atkins to join a few years back (2007 or so???) and I was flattered and honored to do it. Though it is tough staying up from 2AM to 8Am on a Sunday morning, it was worth losing my mind to a dedicated audience every few weeks. And I mean that!

Unfortunately not so long ago KUSF was sold without consulting anyone and now 90.3 is a classical station. However, as far as I know the sale has not yet been approved by the FCC - which is required for the sale to be legal and complete. For more info on this, visit savekusf.org. For the past year or so KUSF "in exile" has been operating from a make-shift studio near the Bayshore area of San Francisco and is only online at the present time.

I want to thank anyone who ever listened to any of my shows at any time and for supporting Rampage Radio in general. It's been a pleasure and an honor and who knows, maybe some day I will be on again. Most importantly, I hope you all understand how important KUSF and Rampage Radio are for San Francisco - and that you spread the word and/or support actively in some manner, the restoration of the REAL KUSF to the airwaves. I mean really, San Francisco WITHOUT a killer diverse college radio station? Man, what happened to this town???

Ok, now click below and listen to my LAST Rampage show ever!!!

Listen to it HERE

2AM
Winger - Seventeen
David Lee Roth - Just Like Paradise
Madam X - Reserve the Right to Rock
Steeler - Born to Rock
Stryper - Free
Richard Cheese - War Ensemble
Uriah Heep - The Wizard
Rainbow - Temple of the King
Onslaught - Flame of the Antichrist
Massacre - Mutilated
Razor - Take this Torch
Sodom - Iron Fist
Motorhead - Whiplash
Manowar - Power of the Sword

3AM
Pat Obrian (Cannibal Corpse) interview
Cannibal Corpse - Demented Aggression
Cannibal Corpse - Skewered from Ear to Ear
Cannibal Corpse - Dead Human Collection
Cannibal Corpse - gallery of suicide
Cannibal Corpse - Pulverised
Cannibal Corpse - Exorcist

4AM
Cannibal Corpse - Covered with Sores
Cannibal Corpse - A Skull Full of Maggots
Body Count - Voodoo
Mystifier - The Witch Poison Recited our gloat
Morbid Angel - World of Shit
Bethlehem - The Eleventh Commandment
Slayer - Spill the Blood
UFO - Rock Bottom (Live)

5AM
Type O Negative - Summer Breeze
Metallica - Fade to Black (slow)
Avenger - Hot and Heavy Express (slow)
Reverend Bizarre - Doomsower
Black Flag - Rise Above
Saint Vitus - The Troll
Kiss - Rockin in the USA

6AM
Mercyful Fate - Nuns have no Fun
Pagan Altar - Pagan Altar
Helstar - Face of the Wicked
Coroner - Nosferatu
Coroner - Masked Jackal
Manilla Road - Children of the Night
Rush - Anthem
Angus - Heavy Weight Warrior
Majesty - Heavy Metal Desire
Montrose - I got the Fire

7AM
Trouble - Psychotic Reaction
Ratt - You think your Tough
Isengard - I Kamp Med Kviteckrist
Dissection - Somberlain
Cirith Ungol - Black Machine
Saxon - Motorcycle Man
Heaven and Hell - Rock and Roll Angel
Insanity - Dread the Dawn
Kyuss - gardenia
Ozzy - No More Tears
Ramones - Surfin Bird
Scorpions - Virgin Killer

Reviews 3/1/12

Cannibal Corpse "Torture" (Metal Blade)
Jesus, these guys are still recording albums? What is this #15? You would think they ran out of ideas by now, but with titles like "As Deep as a knife
will go" and "Followed Home then Killed" it's clear they still got a couple of diabolical ideas under their sweaty tshirts. ANyways, by now everyone has
heard Cannibal COrpse and we all know how they roll. Heavy, brutal, and always a couple new ideas. "Scourge of Iron" is a great example of why Cannibal Corpse
is a great band. You'd never expect a slow, sludgy, almost bluesy riff. Most brutal Death Metal bands can't slow down without sounding like Morbid Angel. But
you gotta hand it to the Corpse (without the body of course), they always find new ways to slice n dice and it's always top notch. This band is extremely self
concious. They know exactly what they've done. And they try not to repeat too much without straying from the basic formula. They aren't outta gas yet. Fucking
A, god bless Cannibal Corpse. Not a band I will miss anytime they are in town. And all the kvlt people can kiss my arse for saying that! This is talent, no
doubt. Only flaw here really, is the Corpsegrinder is starting to sound just a TAD worn out. His job is tough. He has like 3 voices to choose from. That's it.
It's gotta get boring after a while. He needs to do a song where he just talks as fast as he can the WHOLE song. Just fucking auction style. If I ever meet
him I am going to suggest that.

Christian Mistress "Possession" (Relapse)
Singer sounds like the Jefferson Airplane chick. I wish they would do "White Rabbit" I really feel like hearing that right now. Anyways, yeah the band...
Well we've got some obvious classic blues rock riffs going on, some 60s groovy doody stuff...quite retro, but I'm not gonna pass this off as total hipster
retro crap. But I'm not gonna say it's that great either. It's pretty rockin, and I'd say there is some chemistry goin on. But for the most part - it's all about the
chick here. She probably tells all the other guys on a daily basis "hey, you know it's all about me right? If I leave your fucked. You know that right?" Whoah
hey now Mr Choppy guitar! We got some good shred here! I'd say the NWOBHM comparison is valid a times. But it's not all they do. This ain't bad. I may check
em out next time I'm in town. I wouldn't say this is the best the band can do. It sounds like they are too busy being stoked on what a killer singer they scored
and how musically gifted they are. But when the dust settles, I can see this band writing an amazing album. I hope they stick with it. I bet they kick ass live.
But again, as soon as I start getting into it, I'll see all the chicks up front worshipping the singer like she's the first woman to ever front a band like this
and then I'll be like "ah, come on - she's very good, but that isn't necesarry!" Songs are pretty good and they vary. Parts aren't memorable enough. I'm being
too hard on them. They are good, check em out!

Date Rape "Sugar Coated Violence"
Ukrainian Punk infused shit. If I was totally wasted and in the right mood watching this band playing, and if the right crowd was there to cheer me on,
I'd be in the front row falling down and high five-ing the crazy singer here. The pit would be great. But that's alot of "ifs" and somehow I doubt I'll be in
the Ukraine anytime soon. If you like foreign Punkish loud shit with some dude yelling some foreign shit all loud and monotonous, go for it.

Formloff "Spyhorelandet" (Eisenwald)
Wow, nice fucked up creepy album cover. This is some good creepy shit. What the hell is this guy talking about? It's in a foreign tongue. I'm kinda glad
I don't know wha he is saying, as it is more cryptic and creepy that way. This is almost too easy for these guys. It's so perfectly obscure, yet grim.
Reminds me of my favorite Bethlehem material, and that is not a compliment I give often. The singer rules. He's fuckin wierd and has a few insane tricks
up his sleave. Do not trust him! Very grim and dark. There is an obvious deep rooted Black Metal basis somewhere in here. But here is what is called
progression. As opposed to stagnation and staying in the same generic BM territory. this is a band that knows they must follow their obscure path forward,
and they have done very well here. This is great. I would buy this and listen to it many times. I eat this shit up. Highest rating!

Impiety "Ravage and Conquer" (Pulverised Records)
There is something here that is more than just raw brutality. There is a certain feirce pissed-off hateful feeling this band evokes that is hard to pin
down. I have noticed this trait on most of their recordings. While it's not much different than many extremely brutal bands such as Krisiun and maybe
Angelcorpse in their prime, not many bands can get this feeling across with such consistency. It's not a real specific genre, which I like. It's just really
fast, brutal, and feirce. But it is Death Metal more than anything. It is a blast to the face, nothing less and nothing more. Music to destroy things to.

Thunderkraft "Totentanz" (Svarga Music)
Ah yes! Let us ride to a foreign land and bomb the shores! I dunno why I said that, it's just what these horns and anthemic riffs made me wanna do.
This band is Ukrainian. I get a very narrative vibe from this. But it's a foreign language, so I dunno what the singer is going on about. I think he is saying
"bombs are dropping! Buildings are falling! People are dying, oh how marvelous!" Then this funny looking guy with a strange foreign fashion sense busts in with
some harpsichord keyboard line, just to remind us that we are listening to music from a foreign land. This is very intense, and quite foreign. I suppose it
is kind of like industrial folk Metal with heavy down tuned guitars. It sucks actually. But you know, it's foreign, so people will like it based on that I
guess. Hopefully they can make it onto next year's Pagan Fest and all the confused "Pagan Metal" people can be all stoked at how foreign this band is and that
they are so very exotic for attending a performance by such an obscure band. Ok, maybe SUCK was an extreme word. They are rediculous, and sometimes I like this
stuff. But a band like Metsetoll delivers the same sort of vibe but with more musical integrity. It has it's moments though. Ok, maybe if I'm drunk enough
I'll be one of the people digging the foreign ness of this at Paganfest. It just kinda blends in with typical "pagan whatever metal" somehow. The flute
is kinda cool though.

Toad "Rotten Ride" (Independent)
Ok, this is a trip. From the album cover to the title - I get a real watery loch ness monster sorta feeling. I kinda assumed this would be some weird stoner
rock or something. Instead - it's a bunch of guys kinda jamming in a thick, moody, heavy, dirty manner. It's not so Metal as it is just kinda chaotic and hectic.
The vocalist is useless. He's the type who just shouts without any sort of character which adds anything to the music. All I can think of is some band I seen
at a bar in he Mission back in the 90s. A band who I woulda been way into. But on CD and without the reference of whatever scene/town they are from, it's hard
to get any sort of personal attachment to this. Sometimes I call this sorta band "Unsatanic" because basically, it has many traits of metal, but it's devoid
of any sort of mideival, satanic, classically metal vibe. They sound more like bike messengers or something. Or like a bunch of vaguely hardcore/vaguely
Metal dudes who just got together and said "let's see what happens." It's kinda cool, but like I said - random band at a bar. The good production isn't enough
to bring this TOAD out of the ROTTEN tide. They also have that annoying "no guitar solos allowed" rule, which is almost always a dumb rule.

Reviews 2/15/12

Inferion "The Desolate" (self released)
Blasting drums are blasting my face like a typwriter being used by a speedfreak at 4AM. I always wanted to learn how to type, but instead I use this silly
3 - 4 finger teqnique. Sometime I get fancy and use my pinky for the shift button. This singer sounds like he went to brutal black Metal vocal school.
But he went to guteral death metal vocal school in Sweden before that. He has these 2 abilities at his disposal, and uses them quite confidently. The drummer
has this one symbol - I dunno if it's a china or what, but he sure likes it because every time he hits it, is sounds like I turned the shower on and shut it
off real quick. Maybe he takes lots of showers and likes to remind himself of the shower as he plays. The overall vibe here is quite blackish and european
in flavor. Which is great. Is it a selling point? I dunno. It's good I guess. Sure, why not. This is good! It sounds Euro and mostly Black! Can't do
without it! Then again, it's kinda like those infomercials on TV. By the end, you wanna buy all of the cool items. The food saver, the magic bullet, the
collapsable hangers....but at the end of the day - if you bought all that stuff you'd be broke and you'd have a bunch of shit all over your house and probably
would never get around to using em. In this case, it'd be like buying another Food Saver, even though you already own 15. Sure, it's great to have a food
saver, a back up, and a back up for that. But how many back ups you need depends on how rough you are on your food Saver. I wouldn't want to make that call
for you.

Macabra "Blood Nurtured Nature"
Very brutal and primitive sound. The singer is that guy in the fridge who says "Zuuuuuuul!" in the movie ghosbusters. He is quite scary indeed and I would not
want to be blasted by a direct blow of his gutteral growlings. He does have moments of sensitivity though. But it is limited to somber ramblings and whispers
in the dark. He is quite moody, within his dark world. I think he watches too much Deathklock. That show, funny as it intends to be, is actually quite disturbing
if you watch it too much. Especially when people get all tore up and their faces get all incinerated for whatever fucked up reason. I really can't take too
much of that show. Although the episode about the Blues is a classic. Anyhow - this band is very heavy in that artistic Bolththrowery crusty friendly sorta
way. I mean, it's fuckin brutal and cult and all that. But these "crusty approved" Death Metal bands are getting on my nerves. It's like they are afraid
of playing too many solos because it will scare the crusties away. It's ok guys, really. You are really scaring away the laer Carcass and Cannibal Corpse fans
with this lack of solos thing. Don't tell me can't solo. Bullshit! I don't buy it. Solo you asshole! Overall, heavy and somewhat epic. But just a little too
crusty to its' own detriment. Remember when Metal was lived and died by the hand of Metalheads? Now it seems the crusties decide. Don't get me wrong, I like the
crusties. But they shoulda kept wearing Amoebix and Venom shirts. When hey starting wearing Boltthrower and (old) Carcass, and then Burzum shirs - well that
was cue, but somewhat of an eyebrow raiser. Now they are flat out taking Metal and claiming it, in heir sneaky crusty way. Never trust a crusty!

Profetus "To open the passages in Dusk" (Ahdistuksen Aihio Productions/Rusy Crowbar/Contagion Releasing)
Wow, with a tri label realese like this, I suppose it is quite imporant! Judging from the extremely slow and serious music here, I can say the band themselves
are quite serious. This is Funeral Doom, and I almost never like it because it's too fucking slow. This is part 1 of a 10 part review. This concludes part
1. Check back often for new installments of this review. Or check back in 48 hours when the album is done playing, and the full review shall be available.

Rahu "The Quest for the Vajra of Shadows" (Ahdistuksen Aihio)
Very solid somber, primitive, old school Black Metal. This has that special feeling only cerain bands can get. Reminds me a bit of the first Bethlehem album
"Dark Metal" mixed with early Scandanavian classics. This is what i would call "the real thing" and it is becoming rare these days.

On Top "Top Heavy" (Hpgd Productions)
Big boob chick on the cover. Har har, I get it. "Top Heavy." Wha is this a "Steel Panther" knock off? great, a knock off of a knock off.
A look at the cover and the song titles tells me these guys are harkening back to the 80s glam
era. Musically, it's pretty heavy and solos abound. Vocals suck. Sounds like the guy from "Rage Against the Machine" if he tried to sing glam. Yeah, that's
about right. What the hell is going on with Metal these days? This shit is so confusing. Some of the guitar work is very solid here, but the overall concept
just seems fake and forced. I don't like it. Singer sucks. Did I mention that? This is the sort of band that, at best, keeps the average from slipping into
sub par shit. I dub them "keepers of the average."

Sigh "In Somniphobia" (Candlelight)
Extremely melodic, musically rich, and classically influenced Heavy Metal with Black/Thrash leanings. Typically wierd and random Sigh moments, which is what
has always made them stand out. Retro keyboards and random 70s/Eastern stuff thrown in for effect. I suppose you could call this prog Metal, in the best sense
of the phrase. For me, this is what Opeth is not. Make what you will of that statement! If I recall, this
band has always been progressive. I don't recall liking it as much. They have really honed it to a very tight and catchy art form all their own. Overall
it's a bit too "Raiders of the Lost Ark" for me at the moment. Not sure what that means - perhaps too cinematic and showboaty? I feel like I'm waching some
fucked up Broadway Casino show in China when I listen to this. Anyhow - can't say anyhing bad about this. It comes down to the mood and whether you like it
or not.

Strikemaster "Vicious Nightmare" (Mealhit.com)
I've heard of this band. I guess the are Mexican. I think they are singing in Spanish or perhaps English with a heavy accent. I don't know if they are from
Mexico. Anyhow, this is very solid thrash with a dirty sound to it. Reminds me of the "evil thrash" tha proliferates in Southern California. I like this stuff,
but it just conjures images of a room full of kids all wearing Exumer and Sodom backpatches. This shit was great before everyone sared doing it. Perhaps we
are spoiled here in California - but we just have so much of this crap it's like cream cheese now. Anyways, if you aren't old like me and you haven't heard
enough "evil" Death thrash and are not yet sick of it, check this out. It's very good - just nothing new at all. If they are on some 30 band Thrash bill with
Witchaven, Fueled By Fire, Bonded By Blood, Warbringer - be sure and check em out. I'm not hearing any guitar solos. Please heckle them about this if you
happen to see them live. Thanks.

Venus Star "Setyphorus" (Ahdistuksen Aihio)
Crushingly heavy, primitive, somber, funeral doom. Cliche? yes. Well done? Yes. Better than average? I would say yes. Fucking amazing? Probably not.

Reviews 1/2/12

Coldworker "The Doomsayer's Call" (Listenable)
The album cover looks like a killer 80s Marval Comics image. Anyhow, this is Death Metal. It's very aggressive at times, very heavy and slower at
others. Very solid riffs. Vocals are good, just very typical and just kinda there without adding much. I don't hear many solos. The world doesn't really need
this band, but they are a bit above average I'd say. Mostly because some of the parts stand out as memorable. Songwriting isn't there though, and at the
end of the day I won't be grabbing for this CD again. I'm sure they will fit well opening for Cannibal Corpse or some 30 band Death Fest.

Corrosion of Conformity "s/t" (Candlelight)
This band has devolved back into a previous incarnation recently and have basically restarted right from the point before they went "Swamp/stoner" which
is cool with me because I always thought their early Hardcore material was their best. I've seen them live twice since their return to a 3-peice format, and
they are sounding very good these days. Anyways, this is clearly a progression from the band's "Technocrocy" sound, and in a good way. Mixes the hardcore
and sludged out sections well, without getting caught into any cliches. It sounds like the band jammed a ton on these and got the songs really worked out.
Everything works perfectlt together here, and it's something that can't be faked. It's aggressive, but not
overtly so. Fans of straight forward hardcore might not have the patience and fans of the Peppar era might not have patience with the experimentation and
perhaps lack of dumb headed stoner sections. This sits right in the middle of a few different sounds. The songs are very constructed. This is something with
depth that must be heard repeatedly to appreciate. I plan on doing that.

Dunderbeist "Black Ars and Crooked Tails" (Indie Recordings)
The band name sounds like some german slang for "dumbass." After listening to this, I am going to assume that I am correct as only a complete DUNDERBEIST
would buy this CD! Let me tell you folks, just because it is Norwegian DOES NO mean it is good. Norway's 15 minutes is up. Prepare for at least a few more
years of crappy Nordic pop-metal attempting to cash in on the whole "Black Metal" movement of the 90s. This is like what Creed was to grunge.

Liberteer "Better to Die on Your Feet Than live on your knees" (Relapse)
If you took Amon Amarth and got them to do songs about the American Revolution and Colonial America, you'd be pretty close to what this is. Some of the
interludes remind me of early Enslaved, when they used those dated 80s Keyboards for epic effect. Anyhow, there is a real effort here to incorporate an
American Anthem sort of feel, which is fairly original at this time I'd say. But I guess this was ineviable afer years of European folk inspired Metal.
The song titles seem a bit overly self important sounding, but I haven't read the lyrics so who knows they may be brilliantly insightful and I may wanna go
shoot the president after I read em. But somehow I doubt it. Decent death/grind with a message during troubled times.

Ministry "Relapse" (AFM/13th Plane Records)
I haven't been following Ministry much for the past few years, but I did read something about Al's near death experience from drugs or something. I dunno the
details, but that and the fact Al claimed the band was over around the same time makes sense with the album title. Is he saying he had a relapse literally, that
the band couldn't stay away, or both? Seems like a typical Al Jourgensen clever/sadisic pun. Anyhow - he has always been a great songwriter within the conext
of computerized/drum machine productions. Even when he was creating new wave. In fact, I'd say Al has gotta be one of the best since the dawn of modern
industrial. His gift for marrying samples, noises, and extremely aggressive/catchy riffs is as obvious here as it ever was. The guitars especially have evolved
and gotten quite good. I haven't picked up the last few Ministry albums - but this one sounds pretty inspired and fairly new. Or maybe it's just a complete drug
relapse inspired creation. I mean it's either that or the beginning of the "12 step" era of the band. I tend to think this is the "I fell the fuck off the
wagon HARD" album. This is one I might have to listen to a few times. I sense greatness here.

Nekromantheon "Rise, Vulcan Spectre" (Indie Recordings)
Norwegian Thrash band. Sounds like german Thrash from the 80s mixed with some Slayer, early Sepultura, Morbid Saint, Infernal Majesty...you get the point.
They have specific influences from the harsher side of 80s thrash. They do it very well, but I wouldn't fly to Norway to see em. But if I was in Europe and
they were playing, I would not miss it! Not likely they will ever step foot in the Bay Area, so don't expect to see em here. It would be nice if at least
one Bay Area band did something like this. Dekapitator was that band for a minute, but they are long gone and we are stuck with bands who don't seem to know
the first thing about german/canadian Thrash. Tisk tisk.

Opera XI "Strix Maladictae in Aeternum" (Agonia)
This band photo is rediculous. Some chick wearing nothing but a cape in front, boobs exposed. The other dudes are just standing around trying to look normal.
This is stuffy artsy Black Euro gothic Metal. I am sometimes a sucker for this shit, and I admit this is the better side of this typically wretched genre,
but I'm not sure it is any better than average. Band pic is stupid, song tiles are stupid, but the band does know how to play. there is a nice raw edge. The
thing with epic gothic Black/Death Metal is that if it is overproduced it really amplifies the arty farty fakeness. But with a raw edge it helps promote a
nice underground feeling. This band does have a bit of the old school black metal feel I like. And I am a sucker for gregorian choir vocal chants.
Just not sure if there is enough for this CD to sit alongside the old Einherjer, Mythotyn, Old Man's Child, and Falkenbach material. But the fact it even
comes close is impressive. All the shit talking aside, this is somewhat interesing and I would listen to it again, as the music does have dome depth and it
is possible there is an amazing song somewhere in here. But I am sure their next recording will be more polished and likely lose the good atmosphere which
is present here. Bands like this do not stay raw, they get cleaner and less powerful usually. Hasn't this band been around for years? Why does the name
sound familiar?

Orange goblin "A Eulogy for the Damned" (Candlelight)
I just realized I once knew a girl who posed on the album cover for this band back in the early 2000s. Anyhow, I wasn't real impressed with them back then,
and this does little to change that. Sounds like a commercial version of High on Fire.

Pilgrim "Misery Wizard" (Metal Blade)
great American Reverend Bizarre clone.

Ribozyme "Presenting the Problem" (Indie Recordings)
I think I was reading the side of the box of Special K cereal when I firs saw the word "Ribozyme." It must be the thing that gives it that slightly bitter,
shitty taste. I'm not sure it is healthy either. Someone remind me that Indie Recordings releases nothing but SHITE! I mean, what is this? Alice in Chains
mixed with the worst parts of American Nu Metal and alt/industrial? I guess this label is about commercial viability. I get it, but it has no place in my
world. Begone!

Root "Heritage of Satan" (Agonia Records)
I've always liked this band. They are weird as fuck and evil. Always a good combination! Being from Easern Europe, they also remain somewhat obscure. Anyways,
the singer in this band is kinda like the Czech version of Vincent Price or Peter Steel in the sense that he's good at telling a scary story at a painfully
slow pace in a very dramatic way. He also has a way of coming up with random stuff you never expect. Songs have much dynamics and are not straight forward.
Production is pretty stripped down and in your face, but has plenty of atmosphere. It is hard to compare this to anything because it is really just removed
from many of the obvious cliches we Americans tend to relate to Death, Thrash, or Black Metal. It sits closest to obscure Death Metal, if anything. But
Root has their own sound, and if you want something different and weird, get this.

Temple of Baal/Ritualization "The Vision of Fading Mankind" (Agonia)
French split LP. Temple of Baal is quite brutal. They've got that almost cliche "Blackened Death" sound which in the veign of Aeturnus and Belphagore.
Nothing fancy, just blast beats, huge riffs, and growled vocals. If you are stoned and in the right mood, I'm sure this would be great. But once you get
over the brutal sound, there is not much lef in the deparment of songwriting. Some sections are cool and break up the monotony, but they come off as extremely
predicable. Vocals are paricularly boring. Fuck this, who's next? Ritualization. Ok now this band has a much more closed in Death Meal sor of tone. Very
aggressive. Almost a throwback to Cannibal Corpse "Butchered at Birth" but with a slight Blackened Euro edge. Vocals are deep and Chris Barnsey. Drums are
typical "can't stop stabbing you" sorta relentless blasting. Though it sounds pretty different than Temple of Baal, it is the same formula. I hear more old
school Death Metal here though. The band Death, to be specific. Kinda ineresting, but lacking of originality. This is the better half of the split I'd say.

Shaxul Retail Store is closed, Shaxul Records lives on!

By the time you read this Shaxul Records, the first Heavy metal Record store in San Francisco, will have closed. My business partner and I took the lease
over in November of 2007 from the previous tenant, which was Reverb Records/F8 (a trance Record Store). We spent a few months remodeling and stocking up merch and
officially opened the doors on April 1st, 2008. The lease ended December 31st 2011 and although the landlord offered us another 5 year extension, we declined
due to very low sales and profit. This was not a surprise and I pretty much expected the store not to last. I just figured I would do it as long as I could
and if it took off, great. If not I would move on. I am proud to have been able to do this, but now it is someone else's turn!

Below are some frequently asked questions I have gotten regarding the store as well as a few I just felt like bringing up. Feel free to send more questions
to shaxul@shaxulrecords.com.

Why did Shaxul Records close?
Shaxul Records was a retail store. The way retail stores work is they buy products at a "wholesale" (discounted) rate then mark the items up in order to make
a profit. Since rent was due every 30 days, that gave me a month in which to recoup merch money and pay rent/expenses. If (and this is a big "if") money is
left after all that at the end of the month,it is called profit, and it is a beautiful thing! Unfortunately, we rarely sold enough in time to accomplish this!
In fact, the store often could not even recoup merch expenses within a month, which means I had to spend partially recouped
merch money on rent and other bills. The whole thing sorta snowballs from there and results in less new product on the shelf, more debt, customers who are
not as excited as they could be, and a generally disgruntled record store owner. That is all a complicated way of saying we didn't sell enough stuff to pay
the bills each month.

Did Amoeba mess your sales up?
When I worked at Trader Joes I noticed that they were usually located right near Safeway or some other huge super market. I noticed how the store benefitted from the
run-off traffic of the larger store. Same idea applied at Shaxul Records. Amoeba brought tons of traffic to our street that would otherwise not be there.
So for every sale I lost, there was probably a good 10 people or more that walked into the store that only came to the Haight because of Amoeba. More foot traffic =
more sales. So, no, Amoeba did not hurt my sales, they helped! But Metal is a slow seller and people buy everything on the internet these days. That is the
real reason we could not sell enough stuff.

What about online sales? Don't they help?
There is too much competition and the market is flooded with too many bands and too many releases. The profit margin is smaller than ever on distributed items
since the internet has caused customers to go more and more direct, driving up wholesale costs and killing potential profit for retailers. So the only way
to make good money is to sell huge amounts or manufacture your own items (both of which Century Media and Relapse do for example.) But that can be even harder
because Metal fans are more picky than ever these days as they are so used to all the options the internet provides them at the touch of a button.
You really need to know what you are doing to make decent money on the internet selling Metal. It's not as easy as you might think. I know one guy who has been
selling stuff on Ebay for years and closely studies all the underground releases. He lives on his girlfriend's couch and is not in a great mood when I see him.

I'm sooooo sad your store closed! Waaaahh!
I am sad too. Although I won't lie, I am extremely relieved not to have to hustle rent every month anymore! Hopefully I speak for some of you when I say the
store had an important symbolic meaning. Fuck yes, San Francisco SHOULD bloody well have at least 1 Metal Record store! But all I can say is that I gave it
a shot and it lasted nearly 4 years. If I coulda found rent for like $500 or free I might have kept going with it. But this is just unheard of in San Francisco
and in today's economic climate. One thing you can do is find some friends who are also dedicated to underground Metal and combine forces to open some sort
of Metal community center. I know it sounds a bit silly, but think if we had an all ages place where people into Metal could meet, trade stuff, see shows,
DJ, etc. Don't let elitist fuckheads discourage you. If you wanna see something done, do it yourself!

So that's it? The end? No more Shaxul?????
No, this is not the end for Shaxul Records. Before I opened the store, I released a few albums of my own bands Sangre Amado, Passive Aggressive, and Ulysses
Siren. My plan was to continue releasing albums, and not just bands I am in. But since the store was often not turning a profit, I had to use my own money to
bail it out more than once and more than twice! This made it impossible to release anything while the store was open. So in a way I am very
glad I can now focus on the label again. As a label I think I can do more for the underground actually. Distributing bands like Metallica, Megadeth, and
Anthrax while not making jack shit is not real helpful to the Metal underground if you ask me. Sure, it's helpful to those bands, but do they really need
my help? Site will remain up www.shaxulrecords.com and also check my Facebook page for the latest news.

You must have taken a real hit financially Shaxul didn't you?!?
I could sit here and exagerrate, but the fact is no, not too bad. I mean sure, I didn't really make anything doing Shaxul records. And if you calculated all
the time I worked without pay - the number would be a nice fat one! But in the end, I was rather careful and didn't get myself too badly into debt. Yes, there
is some. But as long as I can sell off all the shit left over from the store I should be ok. That being said, feel free to donate via paypal!
shaxul@shaxulrecords.com

Any other words of wisdom Mr Shaxul???
I would ask that anyone who has any interest in the Bay Area Metal scene and "how it is doing" to take a look at what happened to Shaxul Records and come
to your own conclusions about the state of affairs here in the "Bay Area Metal Underground." Also, re-read #4!